Sailing Around The World

Drunk and Smoked

Just a little too much of the Turks Lager to make me so tipsy to write right! I started my night out to find a friend but ended up meeting a couple that I think may have changed my outlook on life, “MAYBE”. I guess you are wondering what could be such a life changing effect by a drunk guy typing on a blog site. Well it all started in a small family bar called the Teky Hut in Turtle cover Marine. I meet a lady there at 4:50pm  named Angulita who to my surprise was 45 years old “haha”. Of course I was 3 beers deep and in a lengthy conversation with her about how to cook or whatever the hell we where talking about. It was a good conversation for someone that had not talked to anyone in days. After the time passed to 6:45pm I decided to finish my conversation about her needs, wants and take that little idea to the next bar called Shark Bits! I walked my bored and happy ass to the bar and walked in to see no one that I recognized.  I ordered my favorite beer TURKS and LAGER; it only felt right being the winter season, Thanks Kyle. After slurping the first beer down I ordered another and as I was doing so a very odd and un-ordinary man shouted out at me THOR you have come to save us. I looked down to see a frail man and a business man of equal age looking up at me with big fat grins. I openly excepted the invitation as they were making fun of my red bread and long hair comparing it to the man in the movie THOR. We made small talk speaking of their women and wants. I spoke more to the business man and less to the diesel frail mechanic. I was not surprised that a captain of a family owned 160 foot ship was pissed that OBAMA was made president. After lengthily talks and my trying to convince him that the baby boomer club was shortly to come drop the financial hammer on him by buy every young boy dreams of being his own sea captain that the spoils of baby boomer wealth was only a few year to come. He bought me a beer and drifted off to his fantasy. I withdrew and made myself renewed with a cowboy killer name Marble Red. I breathed in the smoke and ate up the nicotine like I was stuck in a dessert wishing for water. As I devoured the cigarette I turned and found myself to a very good looking couple almost newlyweds. I reached out and grab the wine bottle from there sight and breathed in the cork to act cultured but it had no sent or flavor and I thought I was to fucked up to understand what they were drinking. I looked up and ask what the hell are you drinking. They looked up and where puzzled by my expression. I said “this is a real piece of crap wine I can’t smell anything or maybe I am really drunk” I then looked at the label and it was a Beringer wine HAHA! CRAP WINE! Anyway this brought on a whole lot of Q&A small talk of where, when, and why, conversation. Finally the man asked me why I was stuck in Turks for 2 weeks and I told him why and explained that the solution was simple devised from a text book which anybody could understand. “INSERT FOOT INTO MOUTH”. The good looking man and women said together that he would not know. Why I asked, he said well I am dyslectic. Well! Punch me sideways and call me bob. I never thought a man of such grace could be dyslectic. Anyway as the conversation dulled to a very boring this or that  a man very short and glass eyed nosed into the conversation. He said “ are you from ONTARIO?” I said yes many Jacques come from Canada I think.  Hell maybe we do but this could be more interesting then the young engaged couple. I turn my attention to him and his wife. Anyway I asked them what they were dong in TurKs. They said just hanging out for 3 weeks! I instantly asked “what the Fuck are you going to do in Turks for 3 weeks” and the reply was simple “AMYTHING WE WANT”. Long story short they arrived by a helicopter and where staying at a very nice apartment/condo. Their names where SAM and Bill. They asked me simply what I was doing alone in a bar and so young in Turks. I simple said I am sailing around the world to find myself. Guess what? Dead silence from both!. I waited a good minute or two but they just looked at me and said well you will not find yourself sailing around the world. “O yeah do! FUCKING tell”? As I digested the thought that the ocean and sea did not have the answer to my questions of who  I am! I instead listened.

Shit! Before I got to the old or young couple I forgot to tell you about caption hook as I called him. I walked up to the bar to an older man who I found out was in his 50’s and did not divulge his name. I said to him that I loved his hook earring and I would call him from now on that his name to me was Caption Hook. Shortly after our drunken introduction he asked me about the single women in the bar? I said well the women to the back are consumed with their partners, not sure if there boyfriend/married. Second the girls to the right on the bar are with the young man who is to marring  the blonde sister and all the rest are her sisters “bummer!” The last lot of females are bartenders and well that’s it friend. As I explained the situation the caption explain his intentions and asked if he could find a line of snow to a group of lovely hookers. I explained shortly that I had no interest in snow or the urge to hook into a rip tuna! So we laughed and drunk beer on his dim and somehow I turned to the old/young couple I previously talked about.

As I tried yelling with great reticulation the older man could not understand my words being muffled out by the one man band and base in the bar. The older couple asked to retire back further into the dark quieter bar area and I of course agreed. To this point I was entrapped by their life experiences of failed and raise and then fall again. I walked back with them to a small table and asked them many questions. The most eye opening question was this. I asked with so many different business how did you know you would have a retirement? They simple replied they did not know and that they have started many businesses. They had higher education and explained that in their 20’ they were busy finding themselves but had no idea what they wanted out of life or what they were to be. All they said was that they decided that they could do this and did it! Learned the craft and where the best until it made no money. Then they moved to the next thing that made sense and learned it, lived it, and where the best at it. I asked what about your retirement or as I like to say your safety net. There response was jaw dropping!

Jacques! We are 60 years old! We have had many friend die of cancer, disease, and gods doing! They all died in their 40 to 50s and we decided that life is too important to worry about our 80’s. The government or our family will take care of us if we live that long but I don’t intend to sit back and work my ass off to sit in a nice nursing home drowning in my own spit. I am going to spend $1000 and ride Helicopter to this island and live in a condo with my love and eat what I want. I have some money, but I am spending it now. The best education a person can have is in the real world like sailing around as you are. You will be smart, stronger, and better off than those with hundred thousand dollar educations. No matter what we all die, why spend it all on higher education of those who have not taken the time to experience the real world? They only know how to teacher from the text books and nothing else. It’s your time to learn from the real world.

Funny thing is they where Doctors!

Thanks, Jacques

4 responses

  1. jessA.

    Your drunk writing is great. Such humor.

    January 5, 2013 at 3:38 pm

    • Thanks, always fun writng well drunk! No Filter!

      January 7, 2013 at 1:32 am

  2. tom

    Dale and Jacques, best of luck to you both. I look forward to reading your blog of your adventures on the high seas. Tom

    January 6, 2013 at 1:01 am

  3. Kyle Krueger

    Jacques I just drank your first ever brewed beer and it was still delicious after 3-1/2 years. Check your GMail. Good stories man

    January 6, 2013 at 1:50 am